credits:

hosted by Neocities

header image:
photograph of woman's face from pixabay, edited with pixlr express

all code/design by me; feel free to view source but please do not copy my layout :)

copyright © 2016 Leilani


my guestbook

updates

Tue 17 May 2016
I am conflicted. I am so conflicted. (Yes, hi, me again. Sorry, I didn't realise it was so long since my last prevarication.) I'm actually ready to go. I have 156 items ready to upload (html, css, jpg, js) but here's the thing... on geocities nobody knew you'd updated until you told them (OneList or Yahoo Groups or just email or whatever people used); here, anyone can see what you just uploaded, out of context. My lunatic perfectionist brain just can't cope with that. I don't want anyone to be able to look at an image without seeing it on the page it belongs to and/or in the sequence of other images it is related to. I cannot stand the idea of random visitors being able to click on direct links to anything I've uploaded and see it out of context. I've been arguing with myself over it for about five days now. So, what do I do.....? I could store images externally but that's tricky too because of the way image sharing works these days (and I don't want to pay for a service just to have some special functions or privacy). So. I. don't. know. I'm really farking stuck. I mean, what's the point of me being here if I'm not going to upload? *hangs head, cries*
Fri 22 Apr 2016
Wow, 15 followers now (just trying to work out who the new one is without scrolling through the week's worth of activity updates). Hello, hello, welcome, thank you so much for your infinite patience!! I'm just dropping in to say I did some cleaning and sorting out of the mystery piles of stuff in my room and found some stories I wrote for English class when I was 8 or 9 or 10 (can't find a specific year written anywhere so I'm estimating based on my handwriting and spelling). After I had finished cringeing and spluttering and laughing much too loud I thought hey, why not, add it to the thingies I will post online (eventually). Oh, and I had just finished writing a summary of recent news stories and my opinions when I found out Prince died. Holy crap. He was only 57. That's really not "old" these days. What an awful waste of human life and musical talent. I will have to dig out my Prince CDs and play them very loudly so the neighbours know I am mourning. (Well, they played Celine Dion very loudly when her husband died, so it's only right I return the favour, ahem).
Mon 18 Apr 2016
Deep sigh. I've had a fair bit of internal conflict about how to structure sections of this site and one of the obstacles to actually (there's that word again) getting anything finished and uploaded was me trying to be "good" by web 2.0 standards and make all sections of the site look the same apart from the colour scheme, and the header. This just will not work, I'm sorry. The art section needs to have a very neutral scheme so as not to detract attention from the content; basically this means greyscale. I had been using dimmed/desaturated pastel sets (created with various tools on my phone and online) for the schemes for the other sections, but nothing was ever quite right, and what looked lovely on the laptop was garish and horrible on my phone. Wrestled with myself over the idea of letting mobile viewers see completely unstyled content (apart from block elements like p, h1-h5, bold, italic, and so on), but I'm really not happy with that either. There must be some colour, at the very least: background colour, text colour, link colours. Other than that, sigh sigh sigh, I suppose it can be unstyled for mobile. But I'm still left with the problem (self-inflicted, of course) of layouts. They aren't going to be able to look the same. I have some very short bits of text that need to be compactly presented, and other longer bits of text that need a wider container, and other short bits of text that might have a couple of imbedded images, so, do I let the image hang out over the edge of the text margin, or do I template those slightly differently? I think what I have to do is have a template for each type of content (short text, long text, short text with images) regardless of the section it is going to be in (wordy or ttim at this stage - art may have some captions but it is mainly image-centric so a simple grid format will do). I'm giving myself permission to do this as it seems to be necessary. *rolls eyes at self*
× In other news, last week I wrote a poem. I'm proud of myself cos I haven't done that in a while. It's not massively good but I like it, and I will post it here sometime soon (hopefully soon).
Fri 15 Apr 2016
This has to be some kind of record - posting three times in five days! But if you've been here before you know it's nothing to get excited about really; basically means I'm still dithering. But, I did actually add something new even though it's only a placeholder: art. Another section, yeah. Giving myself more to do, yeah. Not actually finishing anything, yeah. And I say "actual(ly)" way too much. The blurb on there now explains what it's going to be about. Yeah. :)
Wed 13 Apr 2016
Sooner or later, everyone gets hacked. That's my theory, anyway. Very strange activity in my inbox, various sites trying to confirm that I want to cancel my account, a shedload of invoices (from companies I've heard of but never dealt with) made out to my birth name (which has not been in use since I was at school). Changed my password, contacted tech support, and have been trying to decide what I ought to worry about. Do I really need that second Instagram account I've already lost interest in? Do I really need three Twitter accounts I almost never use? No, and no. But it's worth keeping them at least to reduce the likelihood of others claiming my work as their own (the former) and/or tarnishing my online reputation by posting rubbish/offensive content on my account (the latter). And also to preserve my usernames. So I have to change those passwords too, and probably change the email accounts they are associated with, and change the passwords on those email accounts as well, and while I'm at it, why not just shapeshift my whole life into something less complicated...?!!
This is actually not an excuse for continued lack of content, this is an actual update of actual information. For a change.
Mon 11 Apr 2016
omg... seriously... I can't stand myself sometimes. I'm so full of good intentions that go nowhere. The other night I dreamt I was updating this site with lots of stuff... and then I woke up and... ahhhh... *sad face* Apart from my procrastination and poor time management skills there is now this other factor - I no longer have a desk. Someone sat on it and it broke. Yes, this is a laptop, but, uh, I don't have much lap. *more sad face* It just makes it more difficult and awkward to do anything. Am I making excuses? Why, yes I am - it's one of my skills. *eyeroll* Sorry, sorry... I have 13 followers now which is really, really bizzarrrrre (never can remember how to spell that so I'll just throw in some extra letters, why not). omg omg omg *holds head in hands* One day I might manage to reward all you lovely people with some actual content to look at. Sorry, sorry, sorry... *walks out of room backwards*
Thu 31 Mar 2016
Hmm, yes, so, I had this dream where I didn't know what my name was, it might have been Judy or Nina, and I was about to move house but I had locked myself out of my apartment and I was waiting for my friend who was going to help me move. In other news, no, no actual updates yet, and I now have 12 followers and no idea how that happened (given I've had this site for 2 months now and done almost nothing with it). Faaaaah. Mmm. Yep. Oh, but, still working on it. And why isn't "procrastination" a popular tag, uh??
Thu 17 Mar 2016
Yah, I knowwww - now I'm just posting updates to avoid actually updating. Well, not avoid... I just can't stick with it. Lack of sleep, too much caffeine, general madness...
This is so me right now:
64kb jpeg
Bahahahaha... aaaa... aha... ha... aah.
Tue 15 Mar 2016
Wow, I have 11 followers now! I have no idea how that happened! Considering there's not much here to look at, that's amazing. Hello and welcome all you nice people :) I'm still trying to get this internal page design finalised (at least I have decided to use a horrible mix of tables and css - now I just have to choose some complementary colours and fiddle with a couple of other little things... hahaha). It seems so simple, but it takes forever (because I am a perfectionist lunatic). Meantimes I thought why not add a guestbook. Then it looks like I'm doing something. Yup. Tada! Guestbook! Knowing me I will probably customise the hell out of the design later. Meantimes I'm being good and leaving it alone.
Sat 12 Mar 2016
I swear... the more I work on my layout the less I like it, and the more I try to "do the right thing" and only use css positioning and not tables I think but this is the one time I'm allowed to do clunky code cos it's, yannow, like geocities ...and I bite my lip and agonise over it while I tweak and tweak and tweak and realise I've spent about 4 hours just trying to get the navigation to look okay (meaning not like I'm trying too hard but also not ugly as all get-out). Ways I can deal with this? Oh, make the css only applicable to non-mobile devices, so the pages are readable and usable but unstyled on mobile devices. Is that a good compromise? I don't want to spend what will probably be weeks writing a separate stylesheet for phones. Or else... idk. Start again? *cries*
Thu 10 Mar 2016
Aaaaagh. Another week and more and I still haven't made any significant progress. Today I have five whole hours all to myself (which is very rare - might happen three or four times a year) so I need to make the most of it and get my content up. Seriously. *chides self* But of course what's happened is that since it's taken so long for me to finalise a layout for internal pages (as well as trying to figure out some javascript things), I no longer like the design of this landing/splash/launch page. It might just be my typical procrastination (do anything other than what I'm supposed to be doing) or it might be .... ah, might but probably won't be. Like, sensible. I have been feeling a little bit guilty that this page doesn't display nicely on phones (or any small screen). That said, the alternative design I have been hankering to make isn't mobile-friendly either. Well, let's see if I can at least do the internal pages. Then I can "treat myself" by redesigning this page. If. Big if. Yah...
Wed 2 Mar 2016
Wisdom teeth are out. I can eat now but my mouth is still sore and will be for a while, I suppose. Wanted to put some more content up but given this is all static html (still trying to figure out how to do with javascript what I would usually do with php) I feel I should finalise the layout for internal pages first otherwise I will just have to redo them all later anyway. Sigh.
Sun 21 Feb 2016
Still a work in progress but I wanted to have something significant uploaded before I get my teeth done. Until I figure out where I'm going to put the navigation, just gonna stick content links here (not that there's much content yet, aha).

Thu 18 Feb 2016
Sorry for the continuing lack of meaningful updates - it has been mental here. People just can't seem to leave me alone for five seconds. And some people (grrr) keep making more things for me to do (read: housework). Which they could do themselves if they could be arsed, but they are arseless, apparently. And I need some major dental work which hopefully can be done next week so I will be all puffy and on stupid drugs (painkillers) and feeling sorry for myself and might or might not get anything posted before then. It depends. ::eyeroll:: People are annoying. The joys of sharing your living space with others. (Not.)
Thu 11 Feb 2016
How odd!! I changed the username then almost straight after I thought "why did I do that? now I feel obliged to make the username relate to the site content" but couldn't get back on the computer to change it again until now. I logged in and found I had two followers. I'm not sure whether changing my username back (to leilani) would mean anything now. It's only a difference of 1 character in length. So I'll leave it. "53ideas" is just an expression of my inability to stick to things and finish them, like I have one idea a week (that seems like a really good idea at the time, haha), and "one left over" that didn't fit anywhere (isn't there always one something left over?). One idea a week for a year, and one left over, equals 53 ideas. Ha. Welcome, followers. I will get my new layout up soon, providing the people that interrupt me leave me alone for a while. Argh.
Tue 9 Feb 2016
Okay, finally I am making some progress with my custom site design. I had been wondering whether I wanted to change my username (not really happy with my choice) but didn't know what to change it to. I've been playing with site name generators (including wordoid, which was the best of about seven) and that inspired me to come up with something by myself. Wheeee! Haha. So there will be a big design change here as soon as I can code up what I plan to do. There's an image from pixabay which I modified with pixlr and I'm happy with it now. It will probably look awful on phones but I'm not going to care about that too much... because the image will only be on this front/landing/splash page and then inside pages will be more mobile-friendly. I just wish Ihad more uninterrupted time to work on it.
Wed 3 Feb 2016
Guess what I hate... I hate internet outages, and I hate that I got suckered into trusting the cloud with all my stuff. Oh, it may be "more convenient" to have access to your files from whichever darned device you happen to be using, but if you have no internet (not counting shitty public wifi which is slow and not secure at all) ..... if you have no internet you are screwed. Not enough bandwidth on my phone to hotspot a connection with it so I just had to wait. Now my computer is trying to download umpteen updates... so everything is slow as flapdooley anyway. So hey, thank you for stopping by, and sorry there hasn't been anything new posted this week but I couldn't get to anything to work on or update. But I am downloading all my files now and I will be working on them offline in future. Dr0pb0x etc can go hump itself.
23 Jan 2016
It's been a heck of a long time since I did absolutely everything by hand. I'm ashamed actually. I was seduced by automation (Blogger, LiveJournal, Xanga, WordPress) and then I just got lazy. I can still write html, I'm pretty sure... very basic though it will be. I'm sure I've forgotten flipping everything really useful, haha.

Can't be bothered editing the stylesheet right now so I'm just kludging it with inline styles. Terrible, terrible, I know, but hell, there's no proper doctype (transitional or shock horror strict... there's nae gonna be any strict on here, I don't think) ... I don't think anyone cares all that much. Especially since neocities exists in the spirit of its forebear geocities.

Forgive the centred text. Or don't. Whatever. This will be different later. I may play with some predefined templates but knowing me I will not be happy until I've coded every last bit myself. Perfectionist lunatic that I am.

Leilani (lay-LAH-nee) —
probably older than you; cis/het & taken